Why?

If you are near my little Tyli, you will probably be hearing the question "why?" after anything you say. It is her newest, and most very annoying saying ever. I know she doesn't really care why, but uses it to sound mature- I think. Maybe it's just easier to say than most other words available. On the other hand, it is a question I am now asking myself.

Some of you may know, others did not, but after my last miscarriage we waited the allotted time of 6 weeks, and then guess what... we got pregnant again! I was so excited and could tell everything was going well, the hormones were SURGING! Plus, my identical twin, (yes, we are identical even if I don't think we look that much alike!) Jeni, discovered she too was pregnant. (A lot further along than I though.) A friend asked me if I was scared, since my miscarriage had happened not too long ago, but my reply was, "No, I am paranoid!" I was so excited as I passed the 6 week mark that i miscarried at last time, and then on past the 7th week mark as well. Then it happened. Last Friday I started "spotting" again, but after being checked out by my Dr. on Wednesday, I was told everything seemed normal, but to call if things got worse. By the next morning, I was sure the spotting was over. Things seemed absolutely fine and regular Thursday night so imagine my horror when I went to the bathroom Friday morning during my Preschool Halloween party only to discover I was indeed miscarrying. Luckily for me, the moms helped out with the end of the party, but things only got worse from there. My Dr. wanted me to go into Labor and Delivery if things got worse, but I know what to expect and look for, and will wait until it is absolutely necessary this time before we go. This all leads me back to Ty's favorite saying; why? I know Heavenly Father wanted me to get pregnant again, but in a lot of ways, I feel as if it is a cruel joke! Why? 2 miscarriages in 3 months? And to have received an answer so clearly. I am emotionless right now, but along with this, I feel faithless. I really don't know if I will ever be able to put my faith in Him and try and have another baby. It is such a hard thing to go through emotionally, especially so close together. I just can't even explain the feelings I have right now, which doesn't help my endless ramblings to try and make myself feel better. All I ask is that you'll pray for me- that I can handle this again. Thanks

A first- and probably a last!

A few weeks ago, I was blessed by the sale at Fry's! I was able to purchase an entire 3-month supply of food for me and my family in just a little over $100! Most of it fit in my huge pantry, and for once, it looked a little full. It didn't last long, as I used a can of cream of chicken soup and it threw off the whole balance! Oh well. I just need to keep building on it, which is my goal for the next few months and then for forever! I was so proud of my full pantry I actually cried. Yah, I'm crazy, but at least we have food!

Our First Field Trip

Hadley, Becca, and Dallin
Parker, Dallin, and McKade saying hello to a fireman all dressed up. I asked them to do this so the children would know what they look and sound like when they come into a fire in case a child is ever trapped. They look and sound scary, so we made sure the children know that they aren't a scary monster- they are our helping friends who are there to save and help us! (Some of the kids still wouldn't go near him though!)

Brad, Parker, Jake, Aiden, Dallin, Becca, Hadley, Ty, me, and McKade with all of our Firemen Friends! The kids thought this was so cool- sitting on the bumper of the fire truck!

October was deemed "Safety Month" by me for my preschool. I thought, why not- we'll be talking about being safe for Halloween anyways. We learned about Stranger Danger, water safety, Fire safety, dangerous things that could be around our houses that we should NOT touch, phone numbers, addresses, and all about 911! The kids had fun, and to top it all off, we went to the Queen Creek Fire Department for a field trip. All the kids were "shell shocked" and didn't ask the million questions we discussed before we left. They were cute, and we were lucky to have my brother-in-law, Brad, who works for the Parks and Rec for the Town of QC and Steph, and their boys join us. I could tell Parker thought it was neat! We got to see everything in and on a fire truck (the kids got to sit inside), we saw their clothing, we saw the inside of the fire station and it was funny listening to the kiddos as they discovered that the firefighters each had a bed to sleep in like they did at home and a kitchen, and a TV. The kids got coloring books and crayons and stickers. (That was the end of the tour for them, as they all sat right down to color- not hearing another word!) It was a great time overall, and I look forward to next year's field trip there. Oh, did I mention that, once again- for the second year in a row, I have the most amazing parents to these preschoolers who are and were so willing to come and help out?

WAYYYY Behind!

I have to appologize to you all, as I have not posted anything in so long. I am still here- barely ticking it feels like. I have MUCH to post about, so look for some upcoming posts. Till then!

I'm an Aunt (again)!!!!!!!!

Yay, He's finally here! Tye Christopher Johnson came into this world early this morning, uping my count of nephews to 7 (nieces 1). I couldn't be happier for Ryan and Jenn, and would like to wish my sister-in-law a speedy reccovery. I am told she did awesome (what doesn't she do that's not?) and am proud of her. I really would like to see a picture though (hint, hint!) but I understand it was a long night with MANY more to follow so I'll cut Ryan some slack. Besides, they live in the Eastern part of our country where they currently have no gas, so a trip home just to send us some pictures might not be feasible. Tye clocked in at 7 .13 lbs and 19 1/2 in. long. I can't wait to meet "TC" and niether can my Ty. (She is excited but soooo confused when we tell her, "no, Ty Ty, not you, but Aunt Jennifer's baby Tye was born today. The look on her face is priceless!) We love you guys and thanks for giving me another nephew, making me an aunt again!

It's here!

Did any of you feel it last night? I sure did! I mean, who could miss it after a very HOT, long, Arizona summer? I am talking about that really cool chill in the air- all night long! We finally were able to sleep with our window open last night, and I couldn't sleep because I was too cold! (YAY!!) Cauley frowned on me as I asked him to get me a blanket while I lay in bed earlier this morning. Autumn is my most favorite time of year. I have been in anticipation for it for about a month now, but finally experienced it these past 12 hours. I am (un)patiently waiting for my Scentsy order to get here with all my fall scents I ordered about a week ago. I love the fall, and here is why:
*The air gets cooler- you know, the chill that starts creeping in, like when we were little and would be waiting at the bus stop with as thin of a jacket as we could find so we didn't sweat to death bringing it home.
*It's football season! I know, girls aren't supposed to like football, but I always have. Plus, it brings back memories from High School, which are fun to remember sometimes. (The football season here would be a lot nicer if I didn't sweat to death at each game early on in the season!)
*The leaves change color- this I don't really get to see here in the Valley, but I can drive about an hour or less and catch the whole experience!
*Halloween- my kids favorite holiday. They have all changed their minds about what they are going to be about 53 times each already, but it's fun to hear all of their interesting choices.
*The smell!!!! This one is my favorite! There are so many smells of autumn that I don't know where to begin. First, there is the smell of the football games. Next, the smell of cooler air. Then there's the heavenly baking smells that accommodate this time of year. Finally, there is the scent of what the cooler air is going to be bringing- the Winter Holidays!

My New Background

A BIG thank you to my awesome husband for helping me make my new background! As most of you know, I can never make up my mind!

This is my husband. This is my husband wearing bling. ( and a really tight under armor shirt.) Any questions?

Preschool is in session!

Jacob, McKade, Hadley, and Becca Missing: Aiden

Preschool has started up again. We started the 3rd week of August, (due to unfortunate circumstances!), and have been going strong ever since! I feel so blessed to have such awesome students and parents who attend my preschool!

Higley's Beat The Heat 5K

My sister-in-law, Stephanie, and I decided to participate in the 2nd annual Higley High Beat The Heat 5K in August. No, we weren't in shape, and no, we didn't train for it, but we anticipated the date with lots of talk about how our goal was to not come in dead last! We arrived just in time to load up the kiddos into our strollers. (McKade and Parker rode in mine and Bryce rode in his Mamma's while Tyli stayed home with Grandma Kathy and Dallin "helped Cauley" out being the "official" time keeper.) It was hot, and we were all sweating very badly just standing there before the race began, but once the gun went off, it started raining real hard, so I was expecting some relief, but it only got worse. We were only about 1/2 mile into the race when it stopped raining, leaving it more humid than I think I've ever experienced in my life! The race was fun, but hot, and after it was over, Cauley showed me that I pushed a stroller with 2 flat tires. I think the theme for the race for Steph and I was "It's building character!" We laughed a lot- almost too much for what we were supposed to be accomplishing. My favorite quote of the night came from Stephanie as we were running over to get ready to start the race (we were still trying to get kids in the stroller when they were trying to start) she said, "Hurry, take a picture! This is the most running you'll see from us tonight!" One lady laughed, but everyone else looked at us like we were crazy. Good times! Oh yah, I almost forgot, I set a new PR- ok, so it was the first time I have ever done a 5K, so that counts, right? And by the way, we did NOT come in last place- by about 30 people!

WAAAYYYYY Behind!

Sorry! I really have been gone from the blogging world for quite a while now. I'm still here, just been busy. I will be doing a lot of catching up, but don't know where to start, so bear with me, K? It also didn't help that my slow speed dial-up Internet (dial-up being the key words, or maybe it should be SLOW for the key term!) wasn't working very well with me for about a week, so that is why I couldn't leave many messages on your blogs. I'm back, or so I hope!

And yet, another trip to the Dr!

When my children say they're sick, I don't pay much attention until the throwing up or anything unpleasant starts happening. Two weeks into Kindergarten, Dallin came home from school one day with his eyes practically glued shut telling me not how his day of Kindergarten was, but how much his eyes really hurt. It only took a few days and lots of drops for all signs/symptoms of his pink eye to disappear. Then, last night he didn't eat very well, and was unusually quiet before bed. He was up a number of times for silly, trivial things like to get a drink but returning to bed without actually getting a drink and so on. When I got up (way too early) this morning, I found him lying on the couch "freezing." After taking his temp., I decided he might not be going to school today. It only took a few minutes before he started saying his ears hurt. I gave him some motrin and he started feeling better, so we went ahead with preschool and I sent him on to Kindergarten. When I picked him up, he started crying as soon as he saw me and told me his ears really hurt. Hmm. Off to the Dr? Yup. (They couldn't take any more patients for the rest of the day, so I had to go to Twilight Pediatrics.) I ended up dropping off the two younger ones to Cauley as he ended his football practice and took Dallin to the Dr. After a 2 hour wait, and YES, it really was a 2 hour wait (we got there a little before 6 and got out about 20 after 8!), we were finally seen. I felt so bad for Dallin as he sat in the waiting room holding his ears and either moaning or just letting the tears fall because he was in so much pain. I think the only thing that got him through was I promised him he could go get whatever he wanted to eat when we were done. The only things he wanted was a Diet Coke and ice cream. (He must be my son, eh?) Anyways, the dr. ended up giving us the "strong and very expensive" stuff, but hopefully it works. I am praying that this isn't a preview of what is to come this cold and flue season!

With the rain comes much laughter!

Our summer monsoons have come back, but not without the funny comments made by my now 3 year old! The other day we were at Fry's (a grocery store right down the street from my house) in the afternoon. It was thundering and lightning outside, and just as we were going down the cereal isle a big clap of thunder sounded, "shaking" the big building we were in. McKade screamed out "We're all going to die! Run!" and kept repeating this for about a minute. Everyone on our isle and the two surrounding us were laughing hysterically, and one lady even had to come over and tell me how McKade had made her day. Then, this morning as I lay in bed listening to the downpour outside and giving a prayer of gratitude for the rain, I heard my boys up looking out their bedroom window. McKade comes running down the hall to announce that it was raining in their room. I quickly got out of bed and he asked me "Are you coming to save us?" Needless to say, I couldn't help but giggle at his serious and innocent question. That is, until I found out that it wasn't raining in their room, the window was leaking and the water was running in between their window sills. I turned to go get a cloth to clean up the mess only to find McKade with the biggest bucket he could find in his arms to "catch all the water." I love his innocence!

Happy, Happy Birthday, McKade!

If you ask McKade, he will tell you his birthday is "August 23rd." He's right! Saturday my big-but-still-my-little-boy turned 3! He was so adorable and excited for his party, which he chose to follow his big brother, Dallin, and go to peter Piper Pizza. All the kids had fun playing the games and going down the slides, and we all enjoyed the pizza. McKade was so excited to open his presents, which included monster truck after monster truck (which is all he said he wanted!). His favorite presents though came from Grandpa Ruth which was a truck with a trailer carrying a tractor and Grandma Kathy gave him a spider man car jumping thing. (kinda hard to explain.) Anyways, he hasn't put the truck/trailer down yet, except for bath time of course! I just had to include this picture of Parker blowing out the match in his cupcake like a candle. He wanted to keep doing this and it was so funny!

Today McKade had his 3 year check up with Dr. Jones. (I really, really like this DR.!) He is 40 inch. tall (70%), weighs in at 29 1/4 lbs. (20%), and is doing great overall. We did find out today that he has what is called an innocent heart murmur. I was getting worried as Dr. Jones kept listening to his heart, lying him down to listen, making McKade crunch into a sit-up position to listen, and then repeating this for about 10 minutes without saying anything. I guess it is common in really skinny small children, and it is nothing to worry about, but as his mother, I am still worried. They will check it next year to see if it has gone away, and if not, we may be sent to a cardiologist. Other than that, Dr. Jones was very impressed and said McKade is the smartest, best behaved 3 year old he has ever seen. (As his mother, I don't quite agree with the best behaved all the time, but he was very good at the Dr. today.) McKade wouldn't stop spouting off random facts about himself, which was funny like when his birthday is, how to spell his name, what color of shirt everyone in the family wore today, and how long he sat on the toilet yesterday before church because "he had a lot of poo." I for once, couldn't get this child to stop talking!

I am so grateful to have McKade in my life. He is such a blessing, and I learn new things everyday just because I get to be his mother. I love you, McKade, Happy Birthday, Buddy!

I...

I am: totally in love with Cauley, and have been for 9 years now!
I think: way too much
I know: The Church of Jesus Christ of latter Day Saints is the only true church on earth today
I want: only the best for everyone, especially my family
I have: 3 beautiful, energetic, smart, and absolutely wonderful children
I wish: there were 6 more hours to each day
I miss: having all 4 seasons- here we have hot and hotter!: )
I fear: losing my family in an accident
I feel: hot- what else can you feel while living in AZ in August?!
I hear: my kids playing (nicely for the moment)
I smell: my scentsy candle (coconut lemmongrass) mmmmm
I search: ponder and pray : )
I wonder: what tomorrow's going to bring
I regret: Not being close to my identical twin, Jeni
I love: that Cauley loves me so much
I care: too much about what others think, but for some reason i don't do anything about it
I probably should: fold the clothes in the dryer
I always: sleep on my right ear because I'm deaf in the other and then I don't have listen to Cauley snore!: )
I am not: patient- at all!
I believe: in fairy tell endings
I dance: with Ellen every day on her show- my kids like to join me too!
I don't always: bathe my kids regularly, but don't worry, they ARE clean
I fight: my urge to buy junkfood constantly
I write: what's on my mind
I lose: my patience too easily- ok really, what patience?
I win: monopoly every time Cauley and I play, which we don't anymore because he can't win!
I never: get up early to make my husband lunch, he'll just forget it!
I listen: to primary music in my car, and to all my kids singing it which makes my heart melt
I can usually be found: with food spilled somewhere on me
I am scared: of spiders!
I need: to be hugged on a daily basis
I am happy about: life- I have been VERY blessed!
I tag: all of you- it's fun

Nothing

When children come home at the end of the day,
The question they’re asked as they scurry to play
is, “Tell me, what did you do today?”
And the answer that makes you sigh with dismay, is… “Nothing, I did nothing today!”

Perhaps nothing means that I played with blocks,
or erased my chalkboard with socks.
Maybe I painted a picture of blue,
Or learned that bears can have birthdays too.
Maybe I played out in the heat,
Or enjoyed a Zero Hero treat.
Maybe today was the very first time
That my scissors followed a very straight line.
Maybe I learned a song from beginning to end,
Or played with a special brand new friend.

When you are young and your heart has wings,
Nothing can mean so many things!
(Author unknown)

He did it!

I'm sure, since most of you are parents who read this blog, that you too have delighted in the accomplishments your children make in life. I am almost jumping with joy at Dallin's latest accomplishment. His homework this week includes practicing tying his shoes. (5 times today, 3 more tomorrow, etc.) I was a bit worried because Cauley has been working with him for a few months now when he gets his Sunday Shoes on, and I get frustrated watching. Well, I bit my lip and told Dallin that since the rule is that he get his homework done right after school before he can go play, I would (reluctantly) help him today. First time, a little shaky. Second time...HE GOT IT! (ALL BY HIMSELF, as I went to get Tyli out of trouble!) Of course I made him practice his last three times, but he does such a great job! I told him he could show daddy when he got home but he insists that no, he practiced 5 times and that's all he has to do! I am so proud of you, Dallin! I love you!!!

Our Last few days

Have you ever felt like your world is being shaken upside down? These past few days I have! It all started on Tuesday when I picked up Dallin from Kindergarten. He said his eyes hurt, and after inspecting them and all the ugly goobers that were "sleeping" in them, I determined he might have pink eye. Great. We had a lot going on that night, so Cauley ended up taking him and all the kids to the Twilight Pediatrics at around bed time (8:00) to find out for sure. I had a Cub Scout Committee Mtg. that I needed to be at. (for my new super fun calling of Cub Scout Committee Chair!) Cauley himself wasn't feeling well, and still has a really sore throat, aches, and I think the chills. They got home a little before 10:00 with eye drops for Dallin and all of them covered in what was once a chocolate sundea from McDonalds.
That same night I started spotting (By the way, I was pregnant!) It continually got worse until my Dr. had me head to the ER yesterday morning. After blood work and ultrasounds, they determined they didn't know anything (but we'd still have to pay all the bills!) and to go see my Dr. on Friday. Waiting in limbo was stressfull until last night when the cramping got stronger, bleeding VERY heavy, and nausea went away. At least I feel at peace knowing what is happening now. I will have more questions answered tomorrow at the Dr. (hopefully!) So, with three of us mostly down and out right now, I feel frustrated and worried about what else can go wrong. I can't exactly say that our last few days have been blissful, but I am greatful for the experiences!

My turn- again!

Rules, copy and paste on to your blog. Answer all the questions. When you are done, tag at least five more people. Have fun!Place an X in the ones you have done.
(x) Gone on a blind date
(x) Skipped school
( ) Watched someone die
() Been to Canada
() Been to Florida
(x) Been on a plane
(x) Been lost
() Been on the opposite side of the country
() Gone to Washington , DC
() Swam in the ocean
(x) Cried yourself to sleep
(x) Played cops and robber
(x) Recently colored with crayons
(x) Sang Karaoke
(x) Paid for a meal with coins only (Dallin thinks that's how you HAVE to pay at Chic-Fil-A!)
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
() Made prank phone calls to a boss
(x) Laughed until you cried
(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x)Written a letter to Santa Claus
(x) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(x) Watched the sunrise with someone you care about (Thant's how Cauley and I got engaged!)
(x) Blown bubbles
(x) Gone ice-skating (after schapperoning a high school winter formal w/ my hubby!)
(x) Been skinny dipping outdoors (Jeni, why did you say anything?)
(x) Gone to the movies
1. Any nickname? Mom
2. Mother's name? Debi (or Grandma Ruth)
3. Favorite drink? Caffiene Free Diet Coke- from the fountain!
4. Tattoo? ask Cauley :)
5. Body Piercing? ears (1 hole in each)
6. How much do you love your job? tons-of course!
7. Birthplace? Pocatello, ID
8. Favorite vacation spot? Going to Idaho to see my family
9. Been to Africa ? No
10. Ever eaten cookies for dinner? Can't say- I know Cauley's reading this!
11. Ever been on TV? Yes
12. Ever steal a traffic sign? no, but I have stolen a for sale sign out of a yard, but felt too guilty and returned it not even 4 minutes later! (During a YW activity nonetheless!)
13. Ever been in a car accident? yes- apparently while in labor
14. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle? 4 doors
15. Favorite salad dressing? Ranch- the creamier the better!
16. Favorite pie? banana creame or coconut cream
17. Favorite number? I cheer for the whole team- no favorites
18. Favorite movie? The Sandlot
19. Favorite holiday? Thanksgiving
20. Favorite Song: I am A Child of God
21. Favorite food? homemade pizza
22. Favorite day of the week? Friday
23. Favorite brand of body wash? Dove
24. Favorite toothpaste? Crest
25. Favorite smell? fresh cut grass, lemmons
26. What do you do to relax? read a book, go for a walk
27. Favorite gift ever given? my children
28. How do you see yourself in 10 years? getting older!
29. Tagged? Stephanie, Laurel, Andrea, Cori, Marie, Melissa, and Kira

Birthday, Kindergarten, and Loads of Fun!

Tate Pratt, Dallin, and Brett Bunker on the first day of school.
These are some of Dallin's new friends who are in his Kindergarten class. The picture below is of Dallin looking like a punk on his first day of Kindergarten. He wouldn't give me a good smile- trust me, this is the best out of several pictures!

We have been having a blast this summer. After our trip to Idaho, I kinda fell off the blogging planet and so I'm trying to do a quick catch up for all of you. Sorry about the crazy order of pics and narrating- I can't quite figure it out. First, we celebrated Cauley's 30th birthday! I got up early with the kids and we made him homemade blueberry muffins, which were very yummy! This was his first year he didn't have football school (camp) on his birthday so we celebrated by him taking the boys to the movie "Speed Racer" which was at the $ theater. Later that evening we went to Seth and Jane's reception here in AZ- such a beautiful couple! This is how I did Tyli's hair. Isn't it cute? It's REALLY easy, but takes a little longer than 3 minutes, so getting her to sit still to finish it is pretty tricky. I find skittles work well. It wasn't like this for the reception because the little stinker pulled it out in a moment of frustration before we got there. Oh well.

My sister-in-law, Stephanie, called me last week and asked me if I wanted to go to The Cheesecake Factory with her for lunch. Apparently it was the Cheesecake Factory's 30th birthday so all their cheesecake was only $1.50 each (slice)! The food was delicious and our company which consisted of me and my three kiddos and Stephanie and her two tiny ones was good, until the end when everyone proved to be a little much to handle. We made it through though, and now I can actually say I have been to the Cheesecake factory! Thanks, Stephanie for inviting me- I would say lets do it again sometime, but maybe we should get a sitter first.:-)

I just want to point out these SEVEN pieces of cheesecake on our table. I love cheesecake, but only one of them was for me. The other six were for Stephanie. You see, she REALLY LOVES cheesecake! Just kidding- she took them to friends and family. Dallin took this picture as he thinks he's a photographer. He wants a digital camera for Christmas.

Last but not least, this is us playing at the Johnson Ranch Splash pad. My poor kids have been couped up because of the heat, so last Friday we headed over with Stephanie and her kids. We all had a BLAST running around and getting wet. What a great way to beat the heat! If only I could get my kids to stop drinking the reclaimed water!